INDIAN STYLE: London-based businessman Agnivesh Aggarwal, 27, opted for an arranged marriage with Puja Bangur, 25

London is both birthplace and home for Sonny Sharma. But his heart is where his roots are: India. On February 18, 2002, Sharma, 25, will tie the knot with Radhika Marya, a Punjabi girl he met in the US, at Delhi's Hotel Hyatt Regency. It will be a traditional Hindu wedding-beaming parents, the holy pyre, a pundit, the seven pheras, marigold showers and garish, cantankerous relatives. A picture-perfect Indian winter wedding that the Sharmas had always dreamt of for their now Dallas-based financial analyst son.

"Like all my non-resident Indian friends back in England and the US," drawls the gung-ho groom-to-be, "even I wanted to get married to an Indian girl in India. Despite living in England 21 years, I never could find anyone there I could relate to in mind, mentality and status. As Linda Goodman would say, 'Marriages are made in heaven', and not here on earth, and certainly not in the UK."

Diaspora: Controversy

BIG BROTHER'S WATCHING Blunkett's White Paper proposes to increase the probationary period for marriages from one year to two. Switching of visa status will not be allowed. So those who come to the UK as visitors, students or in a temporary capacity for less than a six month period cannot switch to marriage status. The person concerned would have to return to the home country before applying for an entry clearance. He/she may apply to the Home Office for indefinite leave to enter the country only after the probation period-which is granted only if the officials are convinced that the marriage is "genuine".

It's not the sort of thing British Home Secretary David Blunkett would like to hear at this moment. His controversial White Paper on asylum and immigration, which faults "fraudulent" arranged marriages as a growing problem in UK's immigration system, has opened a can of worms.

Blunkett's paper says: "There has been a tradition of families originating from the Indian subcontinent wanting to bring spouses from arranged marriages to live with them in the UK. We believe there is a discussion to be had within those communities that continue the practice of arranged marriages as to whether more of these could be undertaken within the settled community here."

The paper has certainly set the debate rolling. There are many who call his new immigration hypothesis "ridiculous", "insensitive" and "politically incorrect". "Who is to say that you will find your life partner in the country you live in? Even if you were both from England, what is to say that there will be any cultural compatibility?" asks Sharma. "To the contrary, from what I've seen and heard, divorce rates are far higher among British Asians who have married among themselves. As a result, all my friends have invariably returned to India to have arranged marriages."

"It is not for the Home Office to decide whom an Asian will marry" LORD DHOLAKIA House of Lords

Sharma's argument: In a global village, even Cupid is global, trans-continental.

Blunkett's veiled threat against the timeless Indian institution of arranged marriages, in this case the tradition of marrying and flying in or "importing" a spouse from the subcontinent to the UK, has necessitated a close reality check of the Indian arranged marriage. The new developments must give British Indian rap singer Apache Indian (nee Steven Kapur) enough reason to revive his decade-old best-selling song Arranged Marriage, on marital crises and the British desi.

There are many cries of protest. Baroness Uddin, who campaigns vociferously against forced marriages in the UK, is outraged that the British Government should try to prescribe a way of life for immigrant communities. "The Home Secretary was poorly advised on the issue of arranged marriages. Telling a particular community no one should marry abroad for race reasons is unreasonable," she asserts.

FORTUNE'S FACE: Indian brides are sought out for their deep-rooted values

Which brings us back to the basic question: What is an arranged marriage? Is it the same as a forced marriage? British media and parliamentarians have often confused the two. Last year, British Member of Parliament Anna Cryer called for greater protection of Asian women who reject "arranged" marriages. Taking up the case of two of her constituents who had been driven away from their homes for defying their families over an "arranged" marriage, she said her objection was to "arranged" marriages that failed and the way some families reacted to those failures.

"The word is a misnomer here. Parents in the UK over a period of time like to introduce their children to suitable partners. There is nothing wrong in it. It is our tradition," insists Lord Dholakia, adding: "Forced marriages are unacceptable, arranged marriages are not."

Blunkett's Big-Brother approach under which arranged marriages would be put under a two-year scrutiny, is putting the Home Office in danger of ridicule. "I hope that the Home Office will not act as a marriage bureau," Dholakia says, stressing that it was not for the Home Office to decide whom an Asian should marry.

"The opposite of an arranged marriage is a disorganised, impetuous one" Inderjit SIngh, Sikh Council of Interfaith Relations

Voicing his concern in the House of Lords on two proposals in particular, he said, "The White Paper states that it will not allow the switching arrangement whereby people in this country seek a change of status by getting married here. It is not the Government's job to determine who is or is not rightly married; that would create a tremendous amount of problems within the community. Equally, there is evidence that people seek their partners from within their communities. Again, it is not for the Government to put this kind of diktat on minorities in this country."

Debate on the paper is significant as the UK attracts a lot of students and visitors who sometimes meet a partner and get married. There have been cases of bogus marriages in the UK such as of one brought to light last year. Gina, "a serial marrier", was jailed for three months after she admitted to having married seven times, getting paid £2,000 each time to register as a bride for people desperate to stay in the UK. The Home Office suspects that 10,000 bogus wedding ceremonies take place in London alone every year to avoid immigration controls.

While observers agree that bogus marriages should be checked, genuine marriages cannot be allowed to bear the brunt, they stress. There are other points of contention that arise. Baroness Uddin is vehement that Blunkett's paper has tainted the image of Asian women. "They have little knowledge about the Asian community and particularly about Asian women who are always seen as victims," she says. She feels strongly that the prejudice against Asian women is reinforced when people say that arranged marriages abuse the rights of women in the country.

Aamir Ghori, a journalist who reports on south Asian affairs, reveals that in the Pakistani community, especially among the Mirpuris, forced marriage is a practice. "I have come across cases where girls who were forced to marry men from Pakistan filed for divorce within six months of returning," he says. In Islamabad, it is not unusual to see girls in bridal wear waiting for visas for their spouses in the wee hours of the morning. "I have come across a number of British Pakistani girls who are happy with the White Paper as they believe it will help them choose someone from here," says Ghori.

Rejections happen the other way round too. Many Pakistani parents take their not-so-educated daughters to Pakistan to marry them to doctors and lawyers. "Often, they are not compatible and the man leaves his wife after some months or years of settling in the UK and then looks for a partner who is more compatible," Ghori adds.

According to a Home Office report, the number of husbands admitted for a probationary year prior to settlement in Britain was 10,600 in 2000, an increase of 1,200 over the previous year. Husbands from the Indian subcontinent accounted for nearly 60 per cent of the total in 2000 compared to almost 50 per cent in 1999. An increase was noted in the number of wives from the Indian subcontinent admitted for a probationary period prior to settlement-from 2,200 to 8,700. This contrasted with a decline in numbers of brides from other regions of the world.

Religious and community leaders have decried the new stricture though. They say arranged marriages are not stipulated in the scriptures. "There is nothing in the Sikh religion about arranged marriage but it is our tradition. The opposite of an arrange marriage is a disorganised, impetuous marriage. However, it is advisable to choose a partner from within the UK who has the same background," says Inderjit Singh, director, Sikh Council of Interfaith Relations.

Reacting in a less measured manner, the Muslim Council of Britain (MCB) has expressed its shock and said that the home secretary should not be prescribing the community on marriage issues. Yousuf Bhailok, mcb's secretary-general, had said earlier that Blunkett was confusing a number of different but serious issues. "The MCB clearly condemns forced marriages and female circumcision, as do the vast majority of the affected communities-Muslim and non-Muslim."

But for people of the subcontinent everywhere, arranged marriages remain a tradition. Sociologists call it a foundation that cannot easily be rocked. It's an arrangement that leans on the most important support system of all-the Indian family.

Says Delhi Kendriya Vidyalaya school teacher Neerada Suresh, "The sacrosanct arranged marriage, sanctified by elders from both sides, is a tradition that will never die. In India, the institution of arranged marriages will go on. Guys will continue to go abroad and still marry the girls their parents choose for them back home. They may also marry of their own choice-more often than not with parental consent-but the girl, be she Maharashtrian or Goan, will still be an Indian. It is deeply ingrained in their psyche to subconsciously root for their roots. It's a very Indian mentality."

Neerada, married to HUDCO chairman V. Suresh, had an arranged marriage in Kerala, a decision she has "not regretted" to this day. She does not expect that her two sons, aged 22 and 16, will subscribe to her views but she will ultimately "yield" to theirs because they are "open to talking about it" with her.

"Times have changed. There are no rules anymore," says Sharma's mother-in-law-to-be Rita Marya. "Even conservative families have to abide by the decisions their children make. Even in an arranged marriage, you have to be sure there is love and that they are going to be happy."